Day 760. Signing off.

Day 760

     This is scary. Even at this moment, as I write this, I want to hold on. I don't want to let go of this thing that has saved me. This simple something that has changed the very essence of who I am. It has changed how I see things. How I live. How I breathe. How I love. What a simple gift it has been. The gift of a blank space on which to write the things that are good in my life. The things that I don't deserve and have anyways. My life's greatest blessings. My joys.

     There have been sad days. There have been angry days. But out of 100 days + 760 days, there has been way more good than bad. Way more beautiful than ugly. Way more happy than sad. I've learned more things than I can ever count by writing for these 860 days. Being thankful has been one of the greatest things I've ever done with my life.

     I made the decision to stop blogging every day because I made another decision that will require much of my daily time and attention. However, Rivers of Thankfulness will not be abandoned. I will post once a month or so. With pictures, of course. And I will be writing daily. Just not here.

     So, as my final post, on this final day, day 760, I will say this:

     There is not a word big enough to say how thankful I am for this blog. For this journey. For this blank space. For this tiny little space on the world wide web. For these past 760 days. For the previous 100 days. Without this place to write everyday, I honestly don't know where I would be. I don't know who I would be. All I know is that I would be lost. I would be sad. I would be scared. I would be angry. These days, this place to write, this little blog called, Rivers of Thankfulness, transformed my life. It was therapy. It was medicine that I never knew existed. Tonight, I am thankful for this blog. For my journey. For the rivers upon rivers upon rivers of thankfulness that overflowed here. That filled me up here. These healing waters that saved my life. There is not any other word but this one upon which to end this journey...Thankful.

   

Happy Birthday, Jen!

Day 759

     Today was my cousin's 40th birthday. Jen is a beautiful person. Inside and out. She is strong and brave. Good and kind. Loving and full of grace. She taught me at a young age to dance, to have fun, and to be spontaneous. Patty and I were so pleased and privileged to be able to spend such a special night with her. And what an awesome night it was. Most definitely the most awesome night we've had out in a long while.

     Thankful for Ginger. Thankful to have been able to spend such a special night out with two of my favorite ladies.

Four little ones I love.

Day 758

 

   

     Thankful for four little people named Casey, Adelyn, Tobin, and Sophia. They keep me smiling and laughing and busy. They make a million little messes wherever they go. They yell a lot. They need a lot. They are always hungry or thirsty or talking or asking questions. They can be a real handful. And I am beyond thankful for my four little ones. And everything that comes along with them. Messes. Tantrums. Noise. But also laughter. And cuddles. And love. So. Much. Love. They are filled with it. 

     

These two...

Day 757

     Thankful for these two.

This day made me smile.

Day 756

The best picture I could get of Tobin today. He was waking up as I was taking this, so he has a blurry pic today :(

 

     Thankful for snow days. For cousins. For friends. For cheeks made rosy by the snow. For cold fingers and hands made cold by the snow, and then made warm again by the warmth of a hot chocolate. Thankful for a warm home on this bitterly cold night. Thankful for blankets. And a warm, cuddly dog. Thankful for songs before bedtime. Tobin's request for a bedtime song tonight? Silent Night. He makes me smile. This day made me smile. It was a good one.

Tomorrow is a SNOW DAY!

Day 755

The best picture I could get of Tobin today. 

Adelyn, on the other hand...

...is always up for a photograph. 

     Tomorrow is a SNOW DAY!!! Hey! Ho! Hey! Ho! And there shall be sleeping in. There shall be cuddling in bed in the morning until about 10. There shall be a long breakfast. I'm thinking waffles. There shall be movies. And hot chocolate after sledding. And no school. And no work. And fun, fun, fun all day long. And for all that, I am thankful.

Breakfast. Water Colors. Snow day?

Day 755

     

     Thankful for big breakfasts. Thankful for hot tea with water boiled from a copper bottom kettle on the stove. Thankful for lattes. Thankful for brother and sister art time in the morning. Thankful for pajamas until noon. Thankful for hands made messy with water color paint. Thankful for the bowl of black water leftover from a water color paint session. Thankful for time spent with my family. Thankful that we all understand each other. Thankful for laughter. For tears. Thankful for the threat of snow, even though it's slight. This girl is wishing and hoping and planning and dreaming...of a snow day. I know it was a long weekend. Just wasn't long enough. 

Leap.

Project 365 * 2
Day 754

Adelyn sleeping in her special place :)

Casey and Sophia spent the night so Patty and I could go out on a sister date. Presently, Matt and Patty are out on a sister wife date. Couldn't get a picture of Sophia, though. She's a VERY light sleeper. 

     It was a very good day. There was napping. There was relaxing. There was a gorgeous winter sunset. There was a sister date night. There was a big decision made. I'm nervous about it. But more than that, I'm excited. And I can't wait to get started. It's time for me to take a leap. Can't wait to see where I land.

A full glass and an empty hallway.

Project 365 * 2
Day 753

     Today was a hard day. It was one of those days that when you go to pour yourself a glass of wine, you pour it all the way to the tip top of the glass. And you have to sip some off the top while it's still sitting on the counter to prevent it from spilling as your shuffle up to your bedroom for a nice long cry in the bathtub while The Office plays in the background. I don't need pity. I don't need advice. I know, and every other parent out there knows exactly what I'm talking about. There are just some days when you do a happy dance in the hallway after you put your kids to bed for the night. This was one of those days.

     Thankful for an empty hallway to dance in. Thankful for a wine glass filled all the way up. Thankful for a rainy night to lay in bed and relax.