This time last year, I was snuggled up in a hospital bed with my newborn boy. My pregnancy with Tobin was scary. Pregnancy after the loss of a baby is in a word, terrifying. The feeling that it will all come crashing down is hard to shake. Because, with River, it did come crashing down. Our hopes, dreams, and plans for her ended abruptly. It was a very dark time for me. And then came Tobin. My bright, shining beacon of hope. My lighthouse. He was and has always been a light in the darkness. His smile could melt ice. His hugs make my heart feel whole. To hold him, and nurse him, and stare into his eyes is nothing short of a miracle. He amazes me. He brings me immeasurable joy and peace and happiness. I feel blessed and honored and privileged to call him my son. I'm so happy my boy is one, but my heart aches a bit saying it. I'm happy that he is growing up, healthy and strong, but at the same time, where did this year go? How is he one already? I'm so glad he's a mama's boy, and I get to hold him all the time. I could never tire of holding my baby.
Thankful tonight, and every night for my amazing son. He has blessed my life in more ways than I can count. He has made me the happiest mama alive. So, so, so, thankful for my sweet Tobin Solomon. I could kiss his lips and chubby checks forever.
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